Late at night when I wake up or just can't sleep I often end up clicking around on blogs. I can do this for hours, bouncing around through people's links and photos until I fall back to sleep.

The other night I ended up on one (could not possibly tell you how I got there) and saw this post: may not be.


I really love the message behind it, and it's something I need to think about more in my own life. I've really been mulling over confidence and self-esteem and all those things that we all struggle with, and this girl's post (simple and brief as it is) really gave me a lot of perspective.

Remember that photomotion I mentioned? Well, Melissa and Heather and I took over 1300 pictures to make this movie, and it was one of my favorite things from this summer.

I have anger management issues. These stem from the fact that I have (mostly) unhealthy coping mechanisms, and no method to release the rage that occasionally builds up in me. A couple weeks ago I was so angry that I literally wanted to hit something (which hasn't ever happened before), and so I thought 'Hey! What a great idea! I'll hit something.'

And thus, my interest in boxing. It seemed like a great way to get my aggression out, and get a good work out as well. So I began researching. I found a local class and planned on going this past Tuesday. But then Professor British Accent (who I TA for) decided we needed to chat after class, causing me to miss my class.

Undeterred, I planned all week to go on Saturday. I went to bed early(ish) on Friday night after The Weepies concert, and was up and out the door by 9:10 on Saturday morning. 'I'm so motivated!' I thought to myself, smugly, in the car. And then...I found out that the gym is closing so they aren't holding classes anymore.

That sound you hear is the air being let out of my metaphorical tires.

OK, minor set back. But I had a plan B. Another gym was holding a class at 2. So I went to the grocery store to pick up a few things, went home, baked a little, cleaned my room, etc. I decided it would be a good idea to call this other gym, just in case, and thank goodness I did. For the summer, they move their Saturday class to 10:30, but could I come during the week? They'd love to have me.

Why does it feel like the world is conspiring to not let me hit something?! All I want to do is take up boxing and be like those scenes from that one JLo movie in which she learns to box to beat the snot out of her violent ex-something or other. Only minus the violent ex-something or other. And her butch haircut.

ps-please note the tags: cranky and whining. I am clearly horrible.

When the school year ended, I had sort of a big Summer To Do list:
- bleach stuff
- mend tears
- clean out gmail inbox
- pick/print pictures
- schedule artsbridge interviews
- quit anthro
- clean jewelry
- book covers
- Artsbridge doc

It may not seem like much, but at the time I was working a few jobs and trying to finish a documentary, so getting anything done was a miracle. Well, I'm happy to say that with the exception of cleaning my jewelry (which is on the schedule for this afternoon) I got everything done!

Now, as for my goals for the summer, I wasn't quite as successful:
-eat healthier
-read more
-find a way to enjoy working out
-take more pictures
-make a movie
-write a short script
-learn guitar

I did start learning guitar, read a whole lot more, ate a little bit better, and took many many pictures. However, I didn't make a movie (although some friends and I did make a photomotion that I haven't posted here yet) and I didn't write a short script. As for enjoying working out, I went hiking a bunch this summer, and I really loved it. I hope to do more in the fall and next spring. I really want to hike Mount Timpanogos, but I'm not sure if I can make that happen before it gets too cold.

So there you have it. Maybe documenting all this will motivate me for my Fall goals....we'll see.

Since in a few hours I'll be listening to Death Cab live, I thought it was appropriate to feature them today.

This is the video for "You Are a Tourist". It was filmed live, in one take, and it's scripted (meaning it's not just a video of them playing at a concert). Pretty incredible. Videos like this get me excited to be working in film.

School starts again tomorrow. I have a feeling my schedule this semester (between work and school and TAing) is going to kick my trash.

Even though summer doesn't officially end yet, it feels like it's already gone. And there is a lot I'm going to miss about it:

I love this song. It doesn't really make sense, but I do. Plus, whenever they do that whistle, I picture a cartoon wolf with his eyes bulging out and the train whistle going off...weird? Absolutely. My brain is a scary place sometimes.

Today marks exactly one year since I moved to Utah. To commemorate it, please find below a list of what happened this past year. I might to a photo retrospective as well. If I find the motivation.

This past year, I:
- started graduate school
- turned 26
- started learning guitar
- bought a longboard
- sprained my ankle
- completed my first paid documentary job
- went to Vegas (twice)
- learned to love hiking
- made a photomotion with friends
- fell in love
- got my heart broken
- kissed a few boys
- saw She & Him, The Decemberists, and Bright Eyes live at the Twilight Concert Series
- bought a bike
- moved to Park City for two weeks to work at Sundance
- read some really great books
- got over my fear of having my picture taken
- moved downtown to an apartment
- adopted cats with Kristy
- found a type of hat I can wear (big. floppy. sunhats.)
- started new jobs and left old ones
- went 9 months without seeing my parents (my longest stretch ever)
- got a little bit tan
- went camping twice
- slept under the stars at Heather's cabin
- baked a cake with a flag inside
- learned to love oatmeal
- got a little bit crafy (and even bought a sewing machine)
- played a few too many games of truth or dare...
- watched so many movies
- survived two weeks of strep throat
- learned that the only person you can count on is yourself
- spent far too many hours crying
- threw some really fun parties (why can't I just make a career of that?)
- floated in the Great Salt Lake

I think that about sums it up.

Behold, the intersection of artistic expression and GETTING PAID:

Remember how I missed music monday last week? Ooops. I was kind of busy moving/helping Kristy move/working/finishing a doc.

Moving on...Matt Pond PA is one of my favorite bands that no one has every heard of. And not just because they're from PA. They are absolutely amazing and it is a dream of mine to see them live. Seriously. Listening to their music takes me back to driving around in Sarah's cabrio with the top down on the way to the beach. And walking through the woods at home. And wonderful things in general. That's how sappy I am.